In May, I applied for a job in a similar field to what I've been doing the past four years. I was super-excited about this possibility and doggedly pursued it through three resume revisions, two applications, and conversations with somebody who worked in that office about how to best market myself.
In June, I learned my initial application hadn't been considered in the first round of interviews, but that they were taking a second round of applicants. I re-applied immediately, and was thrilled to be interviewed in early July.
The interview was a week after my layoff. I wasn't ready to be interviewing yet, and I felt that it showed. I had a good interview, but not a great one. I also got a view of this job that made me less excited for it - I didn't really hit it off with the interview panel and the job they described just wasn't as interesting to me as it had been.
Then I had some time to really think about what I want to do. I went on vacation and pondered my options and focused on the things about previous jobs that I really loved. And I realized that this opportunity probably isn't right for me.
And then the organization got back to me, explaining they'd had a slight reorganization of their office and asking if I could come in for another interview.
To be honest, that word, "reorganization," after all I went through at my previous job, makes me cringe. No, that's not quite right. It makes me want to run and hide; to hop on a boat and sail far, far away, and be totally unreachable for the foreseeable future. I want no part of someplace that is making changes right now.
But I went to the interview. It was presented to me as a first interview, again, instead of a progression of the interview process. But it was actually a second interview. And even though I really hit it off with all five (yes, five!) of the people I talked to, and even though I got a much different sense of the job than during my first interview, I left realizing that all the excitement I'd felt in May and June was gone.
That realization kind of feels like a punch in the stomach. I don't want to do what I've been doing for the past four years. Thankfully, I start career counseling and meeting with a headhunter (awesome layoff benefits!) tomorrow. Because I don't think I can make this transition by myself, at least not quickly. And funemployment is a blast, but it can't last forever.
To Be Continued
20 minutes ago